*I have never shied away from a bit of controversy. This blog is purely opinion-based and some may find it controversial.*
A book was recently published exploring what the author has determined is a cultural obsession with women’s appearances that prevents them from being successful. In a nutshell – and her very words, smart women want to be successful but get caught up worrying about how they look. Well, that does not sound like any of the smart women I know.
In a culture where we tiptoe around things so as not to shame people – body shame, breastfeed shame, fat shame, work shame, gender shame, etc – why is this even a discussion? Why is it not okay to care about how we look and strive to look and feel better?
Two Questions:
- What is being used as a standard for “beautiful”? All I see referenced here is thinspiration, eating disorders, cosmetics and a very specific standard of beauty. The stereotypical Barbie Beauty Standard. Search “Top Celebrities in the US” – Beyonce, Taylor Swift, Kim Kardashian, Katy Perry. None look even remotely similar and these are the most popular women in the country. Not one resembles this Barbie standard. Last week I did makeup on a beautiful Filipino woman and her idea of beauty was less-was-more makeup and curves. She seemed far from beauty “sick” and was quite confident – and a medical practitioner, so I would say successful. This weekend, I have a beautiful blonde client who prefers heavy eyeliner, red lipstick and skinny jeans. She is also quite successful and not in the least beauty “sick”. Not everyone has to, or wants to, look the same.Which leads me to…
- Who says we can’t be successful AND care about how we look? And in a culture where first impressions are vital, it helps you achieve success when you care about how you look.
This book steers far from hard data and personalizes stories, telling of Colleen’s eating disorder and Sarah’s insecurities. It seems to be more “science-y” than “science”. It perpetuates the notion that every American woman wants to be tall, thin, blonde and will be laser focused on this until it happens, putting her success behind her aesthetic goal. In our modern world of Kardashians and CrossFit, we idolize everything from big butts to muscular women. Different strokes for different folks. I am not so sure I agree with this theory. Has anyone read it?
